Oh You Stereotypical CGI : A Letter In Satire Form

Oh You Stereotypical CGI : A Letter In Satire Form
By Robert Burford Jr.
Dear Dreamworks Pixar and Future CGI porn movies ,
I'm tired of your underwhelming attempts of showing stereotypes to young children and the impressionable elderly. What you want an example? I'll give you some examples!
1. Shrek.
Thanks Dreamworks for making the black guy a "jive talking " ass , the Latino a pussy in hand me downs ( boots) and the Scottish , over bearing green ogres and the white princess pure until she falls in love with the minority and becomes a over bearing green ogre which leads me to believe someone in your company hates the taste of interracial relationships or at least got an STD from someone at the Scotland Yard section of Disney Land. Here where I live its a " If it's black it needs to go back" approach to movies shown downtown. Though donkey is a Surround Sound Dolby stereotype , his scenes were almost banned due to Murphy voicing him. It was either they don't show the movie or Bruce Willis overdubs and it's a go ahead. Plus donkey marries a big booty dragon? Are we to believe life imitates art and all blacks date purple * ahem white* big booty dragons? Although true , it should not be put in the heads of young black boys who prefer Asians. Puss N Boots? Might as well call him El Pantalones Le Poosy or Boon E Suzuki if you're that perverted. If I hear Puss N Boots udder the Phrase " Ey Princess , how bout some cervesa for me and my essay speedy" I will laugh which will eventually lead me to sue. The Scottish don't even get a proper treatment. You portray people from Scotland as mean , boorish but if intrigued by a Cameron Diaz type or voice by her , will be a gentle soul of a new kind. Well that one's sort of accurate , lets move on shall we?
2. Happy Feet
Dreamworks you're killing me . First you have a retarded penguin who tap dances when you know if you did your research retarded penguins hum The Cosby Show theme song ( Doesn't matter which season but the Bobby Mcferrin on preferably) and drink themselves stupid. Last time I check Robin Williams isn't Mexican! I suppose after your rallies in Idaho you take off your hood and come up with Ideas for Williams ( an At once funny man) as a Mexican , when you know Carlos Mencia makes a living at Waddling like a Penguin and acting DEE DEE DEE Stereophonicallytypical. Your loss , I think. I'd say more but you did have Prince do a song , so good on you. I think you did it on accident as Prince is Indeed , a Homosexual who gets more Puss N Boots while I get Monkey In Mapants.
3.Finding Nemo
Oh Really Pixar? You really think all Lesbians are Blue Fish huh? Well look at Rosie O Donnell will you ? She's clearly a Puffer fish or in Scientific terms a Blow Dyke.
4. Sharks Tale
Dreamwork , you racist bastards. Since when do fish live in the ghettos of the sea? I suppose when they drop out of the school of fish I suppose? Of all the jobs Will Smiths fish character could have you pick a Car Wash? Just because it was a song all kids who see this will turn to there 18 year old mom and ask " Mom who sings this song" to which she'll reply " I think it Aguilera with that black woman who lost all the weight and raps backwards , I don't know sweetie , I accidentally DVR'd BET , when I wanted The Hills on MTV , talk about scary"
So if a fish is black , his dad has to have an Afro. Look up , most of us are bald except Dewaun Bass, who coincidentally is an exception to the rule or Sam Burford . Oh yeah , have the Urban Fish fall in love with the White Fish and be at odds with her and be mixed with the Stereotypical Mafishia. I'm sure you'll one day make a movie where an Urban fish befriends a Gay shark voiced by Jack Black. Wait it's this movie too? I think I speak for Homosexuals when I say " Don't go there Girlfriend , I smack you and it'll hurt like the Dickens" . As you can see clearly I'm not a Homosexual. Sapien yes , sexual no.
(Not CGI but Goof Troop a story about a Black Single Dad and his son going on Misadventures. How far fetched , you know Goofy has Mad Bitches.)
This Concludes my letter you CGI racist .
Love,
Robert Burford Jr.
P.S. Have you read my script for Dingle Barry , the little turd who couldn't let go? Write me back or hit me up on The web site that starts with M.
(c) TBM 2007