Porn. An Elaborate Study and The EXTENSIVE Research That Followed.

Porn. An Elaborate Study and The EXTENSIVE Research That Followed.By Robert "Pennyflamefan1984" Burford Jr.Ah Porn, a magnificent site, well a lot of sites. Is it good? Not really depending on which Religion you are but hey it's better that getting aids rite? I mean you can't really get any STD's from masturbation. The only thing gruesome that comes from it (no pun intended) is maybe a hangnail scar, soap seepage or the mess you left after your room mate told you to go out and by a wireless everything so you can come and go as you please (pun intended).I remember the first time I saw a women's breast on TV. It was in 1991 and they were on a movie called Body Double and it was SWEEET! (Coincidentally it was the first time I figured out how to do the bait and switch, which is when your parents come in to check on you and you have a channel memorized and you quickly switch to Nick at Nite though you don't watch In the Heat of the Night and you yell " Nothing!" though you weren't doing anything to begin with). You must remember that in 1991, it was a " I hope this movie on HBO is rated R and says due to Strong Sexual Content and Nudity" affair from then on.Then puberty hit in 1995 (though some would have you believe it happened in 2006) and it was a done deal. I found out about this new thing, well for me. My friends showed me a Self Help Sex tape, which I think started my love of older Hispanic/white women. 1995-2002 where landmark years for me in terms of this Porn revelation I would have. 1996 changed everything when our next store neighbor, this hott Latina woman, had no bra on underneath and lets just say the turkeys were over cooked. I was horny then more so than I was now, which I think is why I'm bald, well either that or probably because I prayed for male pattern baldness when I was 15, but that's beside the point.That same year, my friends showed me my first porn tape. It was your typical 80's motif, big hair in the United States and Australia (which for you non thinkers is her head and Nether regions) . One even looked like Fran Dresher (which is probably more that likely why I loved The Nanny Unmuted and MUTED). I wish I could've had my own. I couldn't stop thinking about these Mound Of Flesh bouncing up and down. Porn had satisfied my now non-virgin eyes.It was in High School, I borrowed a tape from a great friend of mine ( whose name rhymes with Flick Dimanecki) and I was How do you say it in French? Ma'stir-Bait tin Till Le Cows Com Home No?! HA! No, but it was cool to see faces I'd remember in other Porn’s.(Side Thought: Isn't it weird that most people look at porn, but have a Moral Issue cause it say’s Devils Films or Ass Worship. They're at a crossroads you know? It's like they're Saying " I know I watch porn with 2 girls and one cup but this is I draw the line". How are you going to draw that line hmmm sir or madam? I digress) Through most of High School it was mainly a soft core porn deal. Cinemax would come on and it would have some good ones, I can't remember any of the names (Night Calls, Night Calls 2 , Busty Nurses, Anna Nicole's Private Show) , but they were good. Then High School Ended, Alas I was still a virgin! After High School it got rough (that's what she said) who said that? Huh, oh yeah I got a job and I was lonely relationship wise. I've always had my family, which I thank God for everyday, but the sex part was as dry as Paris Hiltons Nose after a "Powdered Doughnut Party".Then came Tower Records, this is the part where the people dressed as angels sing "AHHHH"A Plethora of Porn in the back rows, though I did live with my parents and a brother. So I'd hide them, though my parents weren't stupid and my brother I'm sure took them when I wasn't there. So many companies such as: Vivid, VCX, Caballero, Red Light District. I was in Porn Ecstasy. I could not wait to go home and see what I had in Store. It wasn't all-great though. I did spend like 200 dollars on two DVD's which looking back was sooo stupid and I did try to quit to, though I had needs like all humans and had several Glorious relapses.Oh this was in 2005 by the way. So here I was this 245lb guy with a sex urge that would knock a Nympho off her feet (which is how I met my Ex Fiancé go fig). I eventually lost 80 pounds, and didn't really look at it as much as I used to. My Mom tells me, "You Can Do Anything, Just Don't Abuse It" Porn wasn't going anywhere and the way I was spending money, it was as if all the porn stars had Syphilis and died, leaving memories of there scenes in four hour DVD compilations.Porn's not a bad thing. Can that be argued? Yes. Can you control it? Heck yeah. If I couldn't control it then how would I be typing this? Your everyday Porn watcher is not an Addict but someone who likes to see people gettin it on. That goes for Men and Women alike. I'm not stupid, I wouldn't look at it if I were marr- well not as much (joking) but Porn isn't bad, it's just there. I'm Mr. Bob and I Watch Adult Films. I'm not ashamed and you shouldn't be either.Thank You for many wonderful nights Penny Flame , Sunny Lane , and Ava Lauren. Well Here's Hoping The Keyboards Wireless Ladies and Gentlemen,
Mr. Bob(c) 2008