Dealing With Her Aunt Flo.

Dealing with her Aunt Flo. The Harsh Realities Of One To Two Weeks.
By Robert " Assassination Tangoe" Burford Jr

So we're chillin in the bed rite? Everything is going great. I love her , she loves me we're doing the good stuff that comes with it. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! I hear as I'm trying to talk to me girlfriend , I ignore it as it should be a drunk passer by . KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!
"Ah Damnit!" I say so that whomevers at the door can hear me.
"Open up already , it's your Aunt Flo , I'm lookin for Anne " she say's in a rather nagging jewish type voice.
"Ooook . Baby it's your Aunt Flo"
"Ugh , I always get irritated when she comes. I just verbally assassinate ( hey there's that word again ladies and gentlemen) people , for no apparent reason. It's awkward and I don't want you to go through it." She say's in a caring manner
"Nah , I'm good " I say in a Very Naive OH SHIT what happened I was about to find out sort of way
I open the door and there's a sudden change in the atmosphere , as if I was about to feel a wrath of sorts. As her Aunt Flo comes in , she starts changing. Her smile is gone and some how she has a gun in her hand , as if it materialized . Now not having dealt with her Auntie Flo Before , I figured " Hey she must be a violent woman"
I was wrong. She was very Violent and played mind tricks on Sar- I mean Annes subconcious.
It was a grueling first week. Her Aunt Flo kept letting her dogs Tam and Pon out of there cages often absorbing what was around them. This pissed Anne off. Now like I said her Aunt can spin it. So Anne uses the gun which is like a gun of no other. It is more or less a verbal gun aimed at my head. My brain suffered atleast Several Insults To The Head , Minor Speech Damage to the Groin Area and Sixteen counts of Pistol Whipping Indecent Silence. I Love her so I aimed to stay strong , but My God Madge!
After a brief two hour psychiatric stint to see if I could function , I decided to go back and try to get Aunt Flo to leave if only for two hours. Talk about R O U G H. My Best Friends Sam Eric and Nick all recommended me to the great Dr. Mi-Doll , a man whom you pay to take Aunt Flo on a date or any Aunt who visits all the Bleeding time. Like Moses Parting the red seas it works, THANK GOD it worked. Anne was like "What happened? Have I been in a daze? Where did that black eye come from? Why are you crying ?"
"Tears...of...joy...." I say to her weeping uncontrollably
After four hours HER AUNT FLO CAME BACK! One more week of this lady and she's gone. It's rough , More Silence , More Put Downs and More Mind Control on Anne. Throwing up the white flag , I just write , study and play video game/music. Do my own thang.
To make a long story short , Aunt Flo comes back every so often and one day I'll actually have it mapped out when she does. Hey , then I'll know when to where a helmet and read self esteem books...wait what?
Good Nite and Fuck You Aunt Flo , You Lousy Comes Every Two Weeks and Attacks The Women Of This Word , Makes Men Go AHHHHH! Period.
Oh This Has Been The Bowel Movement Reporting